An Epic Post Before I Semi-Epically Leave You Again

That picture is for anyone who has ever wondered what it would look like if you sat on your leg until it fell asleep in a bungee-style office chair. Which I'd like to say has never happened to me, but clearly that would be a lie.

I'd also like to say this has never happened to me more than once, and especially never more than twice, but those would also be lies.

SO, HI! I've missed you guys! And a great big WELCOME to my new blog readers. Thank you for introducing yourselves in my recent comments! I'm excited you found me. So I have lots to say today and not much time to say it—please forgive the scattered nature. (Again.)

Tra la la. Where to begin?

OH, HOW ABOUT THIS:

I FINISHED LOLA AND THE BOY NEXT DOOR!!!

This was a thirteen-month (plus nine years) labor of love and heartache and heartbreak and anger and deadness and frustration that stripped away my social life and left me with the heaviest physical and mental exhaustion that I've ever experienced. For thirteen. long. months.

But . . . it's OVER.

(Sort of.)

Early Tuesday morning—when I sent Lola to my agent—was the sort of occasion that deserves sparklers and pony rides and fluffy balls of rainbow cotton candy and a week-long vacation on the Spanish coast that somehow turns into a month, that somehow turns into two months, before dragging myself back to the States with a mermaid tattoo and a mysterious accent before throwing myself into revisions.

I had two days off.

Here's what I did:

• Slept
• Drank jasmine tea in a fancy china cup
• Watched Jónsi's Go Quiet
• Visited a friend at the library
• Drank half a bottle of champagne
• Slept
• Re-read Kelly Link's "The Faery Handbag"
• Slept
• Went to the hardware store
• Slept
• Planted pink and white begonias between 2 and 4 a.m.
• Slept

I was asleep for thirty-something of the forty-eight hours. In other words, I AM TOTALLY AWESOME AT CELEBRATING. Also, I'm pretty sure 2 a.m. is the rational time to garden, right?

NORTH CAROLINA, 2:42 A.M.

ME: Tra la la!

Front door opens. MY CELEBRITY BOYFRIEND THOM YORKE steps onto the porch. Thom sits on the steps and watches me silently for five minutes.

ME: WHAT?

THOM: You're planting begonias.

ME: Yes.

THOM: In the front garden.

ME: Yes.

THOM: In your husband's underpants.

ME: [glances at red boxers] I'M OUT OF CLOTHING. I HAVEN'T DONE ANY LAUNDRY SINCE APRIL.

THOM: Yet it didn't cross your mind that washing the dirty laundry would be a better use of your time.

ME: MY NEIGHBORS HATE ME. MY FRONT YARD IS UGLY. I'M TRYING TO MAKE IT PRETTY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER.

THOM: At two in the morning.

ME: Yes.

THOM: In Jarrod's underpants.

ME: I hide behind the cherry tree whenever a car passes!

THOM: . . .

ME: Go away.

THOM: Bugger off.

ME: Chris Martin is never this difficult. If he were here—

THOM: I'd be back in Oxford with my wife and children.

ME: —if he were here right now, he'd be helping.

THOM: [Glares. Waters one begonia.]

ME: I hate you.

THOM: I hate you more.

ME: [ten minutes later] I love you.

THOM: Quiet. I'm working on a new song, "Transatlantik Nightsick Gardener."

ME: You are not.

THOM: It's a love song.

ME: [thinking] Okay. I'll allow it.


Speaking of! My curmudgeonly, longest-term celebrity boyfriend was recently a part of this list: "100 Hot Men from Across the Pond."

And . . . I'M PROUD AND HONORED to say that I was asked by Heather Moore to (unofficially) help contribute to the list! My lifetime study of Hot British Men has finally paid off!! The amazing part was that I didn't even put Thom on my list. I wanted to, but figured Heather would think I was crazy.

Her response:

"I was not alone in this. One of my compatriots INSISTED."

HUZZAH! And I couldn't agree with the list's caption more:

Anyway. Check out the list! ONE HUNDRED HBM. I can see no better use of your next five minutes.

So where was I? Oh. Yeah.

I had two days off from Lola. Not two months. And this is where the "(Sort of.)" comes in. Because now I have *WONDERFUL* notes from my agent Kate and Laini Taylor (both superheroes for reading the manuscript in record time!), and I have one teeny tiny singular week to turn these notes into a NEW manuscript, one that I'll turn into my editor. Next week. Did I mention I'm turning in my new draft NEXT WEEK?

Pardon me while I cry for a few minutes.

A few more.

Still sobbing.

Sitting in the bottom of my closet. Light's off. Fat gushy tears. Stomach is tight and head is throbbing and this is the end. I'll wither and shrivel and die in here like an indoor fern. The exhaustion, you guys. I don't even know what to say other than:


(1) Thank goodness this will be over in a week.

(2) Thank goodness I love the novel. I do not like it right now, but I love it.

(3) Thank goodness Kate and Laini DO like it. This falls under "Best News I've Heard All Year." Like "HOLY CRAB APPLES, I'M EXPLODING ON YOUR FACE" news.


Except there's no actual exploding because of the exhaustion. It's more like a weak fizz. Like ginger ale, gone flat.

So . . . a few answers to questions before I leave you for another week:


For those who asked how I managed to do the following while indoors:

(A) Get a sunburn.
(B) Put a live beetle into my mouth.


(A) The magic combination of deathly pale skin and sitting beside a window!

(B) My husband and I receive a weekly CSA (Community Supported Agriculture) box. Jarrod picks up our box of veggies straight from the farm. Sometimes, these boxes also contain insects. Sometimes, these insects are clinging to the lettuce. Sometimes, one does not see these clingy insects when one puts the lettuce into one's mouth.

It's strange to have a wiggling beetle on your tongue. And that's all I'm saying about that.

The only species of beetle I want on my tongue.

My friend Amber Nicole Brooks asked this:

Care to share your strategies for producing 19,000 more words in a about a week? I'd love to know your methods...

Cough.

Unfortunately, I did not accomplish this. Lola had grown too complex for me to . . . whip out those words. I DID get this remaining word count, but it took half a month to do so, I had a complex structure already in place, and I worked between 16-22 hours a day. I don't recommend this schedule!

But I do write obscene amounts of (terrible first draft) words in a short time every year during National Novel Writing Month. I highly recommend Chris Baty's (the founder of NaNo) No Plot? No Problem! I give this book ONE HUNDRED PERCENT CREDIT for helping me finish my first draft of Anna and the French Kiss. My first *good* draft of Anna, I credit Laini Taylor's Not for Robots.

Also, I have fast-writing NaNo tips sprinkled throughout these blog posts: one, two, three. Basically, it comes down to this: Allow yourself to suck. You have to write a lot of sucky words before you can write the good ones.

I hope that helps. Good luck!!

Okay, this was awesome. Last week I received one of my favorite comments ever, from fellow Tenner (2010 YA debut author) Lindsey Leavitt:

My six-year-old daughter wants to know if you are the REAL Coraline.
YES SHE IS.

HA HA HA!! I smiled for hours. Thank you for telling me!

Lindsey, by the way, is the author of the fantastic-sounding Princess for Hire, which is currently in my take-to-the-beach-next-week stack of books. I can't wait to read it! (And YES. I'm going to the beach when The Bad Week is over!)

Cover twins! Lindsey's book has the Eiffel Tower on it, too.

And as if this hasn't been filled with enough links, I guest posted on Kiersten White's blog last week. She's in Romania right now, the lucky girl! And all I'll say is that she's a VERY GOOD SPORT for posting what I wrote.

With that clunker of an ending, I'm diving into the revision abyss and bowing away from blogging for another week. Maybe a week plus a few days. I hope you're all having a fantastic June!

Analog and the French Kiss — Excerpt!

Ha ha ha! Today I was inspired by agency sis Carrie Harris. She recently posted an excerpt of her zombie novel Bad Taste in Boys (coming in 2011!), but before posting it, she ran it through Babel Fish several times. The result? Meat-attachment awesomeness.

Babel Fish is a free language translation software. It's also the reason why REAL translators will never lose their jobs.

So . . . at long, long last . . . I'm sharing my first excerpt of Anna and the French Kiss! Here's a selection from page forty-two, simply because forty-two is my favorite number.* You're lucky it happened to be a KISSING PAGE. I translated it twice—once into Japanese and then back into English.

Enjoy!


And next and finally, meant that he lets escape me. And next and finally, the he is kissed to me under the entryway visor which groans. And next I away.

"Analog? It is all right?" someone asks.

All table has scrutinized me.

Do the scream of t. Do the scream of t. Do the scream of t.

"Um. The place where there is a bathroom?" The bathroom is explanation of my taste for all states. If you express that no one furthermore asks.

"As for washroom hall." It is under. St. Clair does which it is worried. You see, you ask the challenge of t. He which perhaps is feared. As for the story concerning the sucking/absorbing prisoner characteristic of the tampon or the P word which is feared is expressed.


And now you know ALL OF MY SECRETS. Hee hee.

Back to work for me! Last night I cut 19,000 words from Lola and the Boy Next Door. Now I have to put 19,000 new words in their place. In, like, a week.

MY JOB IS AWESOME!!!**


*For the record—because I like saying "for the record"—42 is NOT my favorite number because of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy nor because of Coldplay. These are just happy coincidences.***

**No, really, it is.

***The rules of my blog state that since I mentioned Coldplay, now I'm allowed to post a picture of Chris Martin. I love the rules! Here's a tiny picture since we're in the tiny footnotes. I'm picking one where he looks disturbed, because he just learned that I have to replace 19,000 words in one week (while simultaneously proofreading Anna). But don't worry. Right after he makes this face, he gets this really happy expression when he realizes he can go make a sandwich for me, which will help keep up my energy. Chris knows that I like sandwiches. They taste good.

In Which I Reveal . . . the Plot!

The Penguin Fall 2010 catalog is officially out in the world, so I'm finally going to share with you WHAT MY NOVEL IS ABOUT.

YAAAAAY!!

It's about . . .

PARIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hardy har har. I am so mean/lame.

Okay, here's the REAL DESCRIPTION:


A contemporary romance set in the City of Light, guaranteed to make toes tingle and hearts melt

Anna is looking forward to her senior year in Atlanta, where she has a great job, a loyal best friend, and a crush on the verge of becoming more. Which is why she is less than thrilled about being shipped off to boarding school in Paris — until she meets Étienne St. Clair: perfect, Parisian (and English and American), and utterly irresistible. The only problem is that he's taken, and Anna might be, too, if anything comes of her almost-relationship back home.

As winter melts into spring, will a year of romantic near-misses end with the French kiss Anna — and readers — have long awaited?

Do you know what my favorite part is? Can you guess?

THE BOY HAS A NAME.

I am very, very excited about my novel, of course, but I am waaaaay more excited about Étienne St. Clair. I had so much fun writing him! I hope you'll like him, too. Also, two notes about the catalog:


(1) His name is spelled wrong. This version here, on my website, is correct.

(2) There's one part I cut, because it's sort of misleading:

"Étienne St. Clair: perfect, Parisian (and English and American, which makes for a swoon-worthy accent), and utterly irresistible."


It makes it sound like his accent is tri-cultural. He's certainly tri-cultural (and swoon-worthy!), but he has only one accent.

And that accent . . . is English.

HBM for the win!

(DISCLAIMER: Étienne St. Clair does not wear breeches nor cravats. But he does have a T-shirt with Napoleon on it. So that's something.)

In related news, according to Amazon, Anna will be released one week earlier, on December 2nd. I haven't been able to get this confirmed — there's a good chance it could still slide one way or the other — but for now, YAY! Earlier is better!

Sooooo, let's see. What have I been up to?

I'm back from Minneapolis after a surprise overnight layover in Atlanta. My first flight was delayed on the runway, which meant I missed my connecting flight. By ten minutes. That lost ten minutes? Yeah. It cost TEN HOURS. Which was super fun.

Alone. In an airport. For ten hours. With a sore throat, a cold, and propensity to cry in public. I know the situation could have been far worse, but it was certainly . . . unpleasant. And when I staggered home, my copy edits were waiting on my porch.

HURRAH! (*SOB*)

Which leads me to this. After a recent post, the fabulous Katie asked:

I have an editing question: I am thinking you are past the revising part where you have to make up new stuff so why is this editing business so hard? You are my second friend to talk about how utterly draining it is. Why?

Like, there must be some kind of horrible stage between what I would call "major revision" and "editing commas."

Do explain.


First . . . HA!

Second . . . ah, okay. I think the easiest way for me to answer this question is to explain each stage of editing that I've been through. Sorry. This already long post is about to get much longer:


November 2007 — I wrote a novel for NaNoWriMo. It was not called Anna and the French Kiss, but that's what it would become. And I use the word "novel" extremely loosely.

December 2007 to September 2008 — I turned that scrap of a novel into something functional. Bit by bit, piece by piece. There were rewrites in here, but these were still of the "figuring out the major plot" variety. There were also several times that I shared chapters or scenes with critique partners, who gave me feedback. But there weren't any HUGE overhaul revisions. I was still just figuring out the basics.

October 2008 — I show the completed (again, loose definition) Anna to three critique partners. This is the first time I am given MAJOR feedback that requires MAJOR revision. Big things are cut, new things are added, the last third of my novel is rewritten. (It will be rewritten several more times.)

November 2008 to January 2009 — Anna is put into the hands of my dream agent. I begin work on my second novel, Lola and the Boy Next Door. In early January, my dream agent signs me! The world explodes.

January 2009 to February 2009 — I do another revision for my agent. This one is also large and intimidating, but exciting as well. My agent has ideas. I have ideas. They match up. Things look good!

March 2009 to April 2009 — Anna is placed into the hands of two editors. Both are interested. (OMG.) Both say my novel needs serious revision. (Yes. It did.) One editor wants to talk with me about these revisions, to see if our thoughts are aligning. The other asks me to do a revision now. I cut 10,000 words in one week. THAT was a crazy revision. I'm fortunate enough to receive offers from both editors. I accept with the editor I did not do the revision for, but now I have a shiny new copy to share! I send my editor another revision — it's almost like the last one, but with two scenes I'd cut added back in. (One of these scenes is still in the book. The other is not.)

May 2009 to September 2009 — I work on Lola. This is not my happiest nor most productive period. In late September I learn Anna's publishing date has been bumped up a year. Yippee! Which means my editor and I have a LOT of work to do. And not much time to do it. (Not so yippee.)

October 2009 — I edit the bajeezus out of Anna. This is a HUGE HUGE HUGE revision. Multiple chapters cut! Big scenes rewritten! Blah blah blah! Stressssss!! I want to die!!! But then . . . I'm sitting on my prettiest copy of Anna ever. Happy, happy, happy.

November 2009 to February 2010 — I start my third novel. And then I have a month in Paris! And then more Lola. Also, I spend a lot of time catching up on my friends' projects.

March 2010 — I receive my line edits. Line edits are the first time an editor corrects things at a sentence level. For some writers, this round goes smoothly and quickly. And then there are others. I am an other. I'm honestly thankful for this — I wanted to work with my editor because I knew she'd challenge me — but ohmyword. I had a little more than two weeks (one of which was spent in NYC, and was essentially lost) to rewrite the first chapter, cut an entire chapter, and fix . . . everything else. This was another big one. Done in a week. Maddening and heartbreaking and exhilarating.

April 2010 — Welcome to the present! I'm currently working on my first round of copy edits. There will be multiple rounds, but I'm not sure how many. Copy edits are the tinier edits. IMPORTANT edits. But, yes, commas and capitalization and grammar and fact-checking and such, which is far less stressful.


Less stressful, unless you happen to be either Kiersten White or Manning Krull, both of whom are on the receiving end of my endless emails.

To Kiersten: This or that? This or that? This or that?
To Manning: French iz sooooo haaaarrddd. Helllpppp.

Novels are NOT written by one person. I would gladly add the names of at least a dozen people (hello Kiersten, hello Manning) to my cover. Including my copy editor. Whomever you are, dear copy editor, thank you for being awesome. I'm learning so much from you!

So — now that I've taken this question way too far — yes. There is a horrible stage between "major revision" and "editing commas." The name for that stage? MORE GIGANTICALLY HUGE INTIMIDATING REVISIONS. FOR YEARS. IT DOESN'T END. EVER. AND IT WANTS TO DESTROY YOUR SOUL!!

On that happy note, I need to get back to work. Bye!

Editing + Meeting My Editor!

ME #1: OH. Who is THAT??

ME #2: That's our celebrity boyfriend, Jim Sturgess.

ME #1: Wow. Why does bedhead look so much sexier on guys?

ME #2: It really is unfair.

ME #1: [wipes drool off chin, onto jeans] So why are you giving me this picture? What did I do to earn it?

ME #2: BECAUSE WE TOTALLY FINISHED EDITING, YO!

JIM: [enters office] Are you talking to yourself again?

ME: [slams laptop shut] No!

JIM: Bloody hell. So this is where of all of our coffee mugs went.

ME: Do you have a reason for coming in here?

JIM: I, er, don't want you to take this the wrong way, but the other celebrity boyfriends and I have been talking, and, well, you really ought to consider a shower. How many days has it been?

ME: OHMYGOSH I SMELL.

JIM: No! No. You're just . . . a little ripe. That's all.

ME: I WAS WORKING!! REALLY HARD!! ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT!! FOR SO LONG!!

JIM: I know, darling! It's just . . . is that tuna you're eating? Straight from the packet?

ME: I was too tired to cook.

JIM: So you're eating tuna. Straight from the packet.

ME: Um. It would appear so.

JIM: With your fingers.

ME: [blinks] You have preeeetty hair.

JIM: [leans out door] BACKUP! I NEED BACKUP!


So I've been editing Anna and the French Kiss. And now I'm done editing. Until the next round of editing. So, you know, that's what's been happening.

I like editing. Actually, I love it. But it takes a lot of out of me.

I wish I had some glorious nugget of wisdom to impart to you (or to Future Me), but I really don't. My mind is shot to pieces. I'm pleased with the results (my editor is brilllllliant), though I'm already agonizing over certain bits I'd like to fix. But . . . that's how I roll. If deadlines didn't exist, I would NEVER give up my work! I would edit that one thing for the rest of my life.

So now I'm deep in a recovery that involves taking uncontrollable fourteen-hour naps, staring blankly at the accumulated mess in my kitchen, and watching British period dramas.* This is so I can feel refreshed — as soon as humanly possible — to finish another round of Lola. Which is already overdue. Which still has a TON of work left. Which is making me feel like I want to crawl into a ball and die.

Not to be melodramatic or anything.

So! Manhattan! I totally went!

This post is a good time to talk about the main reason I went to New York . . . to meet my editor! And do book-y things!

Like . . .

Visit Books of Wonder, a famous children's bookstore:

Ooo! Ahh!

Naturally, my first stop was the young adult section:

Someday . . . I'll be on this shelf!

But the entire store was fantastic. (It's ALL children's books! How could it not be?) I felt awkward taking too many pictures inside — my apologizes for the lack of bookstore porn — but I did snap these figures hovering above the door:

The Tin Man is my favorite.

Then I went to visit my publisher. Yes, ah hem . . .

THEN I WENT TO VISIT MY PUBLISHER.

Ta-da!

Even more embarrassing than asking to take pictures inside the bookstore, was asking to take a picture of the following sign. Seriously. So embarrassing.

BUT LOOK! THE PENGUIN!!

It was mind-blowing to step off the elevator, see that iconic bird, and realize I have a connection with it now.

COOL.

I was there to meet my editor, Julie Strauss-Gabel. If you've been following this blog for a while, you already know that I like my editor. Very, very much. Julie is the woman behind so many books I'm passionate about — including ALL of John Green's novels, Gayle Forman's If I Stay, and Lauren Myracle's Winnie series.

And, for some reason, she's my editor too.

I'm still scratching my head over how this happened. I honestly haven't been this nervous about meeting someone since I met my husband. I wanted it to go so well, so badly! In fact, I was SO nervous that by the time it was over, and I was back in my friends' brand-new apartment, I threw up in their brand-new toilet. Which was simultaneously a high and a low:

HIGH: It went awesome!
LOW: I am vomiting in my friends' toilet.

But yeah. It went awesome! Julie is just as intelligent and funny and thoughtful in person as she is in her emails and phone calls. I don't know how it's even possible, but I'm MORE thrilled to be working with her now. She's incredible. Period.

(She's making my book so much better, you guys. For instance, if she were editing this blog, she would have just cut the vomiting part.)

Tra la la! Just hangin' out with my editor. Like I do. (Aren't we cute?? Braggidy brag brag.)

She also introduced me to tons of people around the Dutton and Penguin offices. Everyone was so genuinely nice, and I was grateful to have a chance to thank them. At least, I *hope* I remembered to thank everyone! I was in a state of dumbfounded awe the entire time.

The highlight of my entire trip occurred when Julie introduced me to someone who then immediately SHOUTED the full name of the boy in my book! To hear his name coming from the lips of a woman I'd never met (and in such a flattering manner!), was . . . shocking. If I could swallow my tongue, I have no doubt that I would have.

It never ceases to amaze me that anyone could possibly care about this book but me. Or that people will actually read it. People have ALREADY read it!

Surreal. When did this become my life?

I'm feeling a lot of love for Anna and her boy right now . . .

♥♥♥

Coming soon: My last New York post, PLUS a special treat! And it's not tuna!


*SO FAR: Persuasion (2007), The Way We Live Now (2001), Brideshead Revisited (2008) — All three were good. Persuasion was a repeat, and Brideshead was a surprise. The cinematography was outrageously beautiful in an Atonement meets The Brothers Bloom kind of way (Gorgeous English home! Venice! Morocco! Fabulous costumes!), and the acting was superb. Though I wish they would've shaved fifteen minutes off the final running time. It dragged a bit towards the end. Oh well. Still worth watching!

Five Things I Love: March Edition

(1) French lessons from feisty macarons at Cakespy

Emailed to me from Eliza. Merci beaucoup!

(2) Spaced

The SINGULAR TELEVISION-RELATED THING I'm rewarding my good writing behavior with. I so so sososobadly want to be besties with Simon Pegg.

(3) Under Great White Northern Lights

The White Stripes' documentary and live album. I've been going through a secret (not-so-secret now) Jack White phase ever since It Might Get Loud. Which is another excellent documentary for music people! Just so you know.

(4) Little Brown Pen

A goooooooorgeous Parisian blog. Thank you, Shelf Elf, for sending me the link! I honest-to-goodness cried when I looked at it. I *still* miss Paris.

Luckily, travel is on the horizon . . .

(5) New York, New York

Next week, I'm leaving for six days in NYC. I'm visiting my publishing house and in-person meeting my incredible editor, Julie Strauss-Gabel, for the first time.

(Can I say that again?)

I'M VISITING MY PUBLISHING HOUSE AND MEETING MY EDITOR.

(Forgive me. One rarely gets to say things like that in life.)

I'm excited to say hello to everyone at Dutton and to thank them for treating Anna and the French Kiss with such kindness and respect. It takes a LOT of people to get a book published! I am only one teeny tiny little peon in the process. I can't wait to meet the people who are ACTUALLY MAKING IT HAPPEN.

So. I have a question for you, dearest readers.

The trip is longer than I'd originally intended, because I'm staying a few extra days to see Thom Yorke's temporary band, Atoms for Peace.

(Can I say that again?)

I'M SEEING THOM YORKE!!!!!

(For new readers, Thom is both my grouchiest Celebrity Boyfriend and my longest term Celebrity Boyfriend. We go way back. Like, I loved him before it was legal for him to love me back.)

♥♥♥

TYPICAL PHONE CONVERSATION WITH MY BOYFRIEND

ME: Hello, Love. Let's get married.

THOM: You're already married. And I'm in a long-term relationship with the mother of my children. She's a Dante scholar. She's brilliant.

ME: But I looooooove you.

THOM: Bugger off.

ME: I still looooooove you.

THOM: Fine. I love you, too.

ME: *kisses telephone*

THOM: Stop calling me at work. *click*


I've been to the city and done the touristy things before. (Well. Not all of them, because some touristy things are boring.) So I'm looking for WEIRD STUFF to do. And YUMMY STUFF to eat! My only other extracurricular plans so far are:

— Tim Burton exhibition at MoMA
— Frozen hot chocolate at Serendipity

Unless their hot chocolate is overrated. Is it? Have you tried it? I'll be staying with friends in Brooklyn and popping in and out of Manhattan. Anything you recommend to me in my comments — in either city — is very, very welcome! Thank you!

Also . . . what are you loving this March?

Elizabeth Gilbert Saves My Soul (or something slightly less dramatic but no less important)

This is why I love the internet.

Stella heard my cry of help and left the *PERFECT* link in my comments.

I'm sharing it with you, because pretty much everyone expressed concern about the Second Novel Curse. (See? NO ONE can escape!!) It's a talk from Elizabeth Gilbert. I'm not sure how you feel about her — I adore her, but I know many resent her for having the time and money to do what she did, when most of us cannot (I understand this reaction, too) — but I think/hope those of you struggling with the creative process will find something of value in this video.

[In case you're unfamiliar with Elizabeth Gilbert, she wrote Eat Pray Love, a mega-huge bestseller about going through an ugly divorce and finding peace with herself again in Italy (eating), India (praying), and Bali (falling in love). I loved it, and I've read it a few times.]

I cried through at least half of her lecture. It was exactly what I needed to hear. A life-changing, light bulb moment. Thank you, Stella, for looking out for me. I wish I could bake you cookies or give you a bear hug or wash your laundry for a year.

If you're reading this on an RSS reader, you might have to come to my actual blog to watch this. If you still can't see it, you can watch it here.

I hope any writer struggling (and suffering) right now will watch it this week. And I hope you'll find comfort in it, like I did.

More comments stuff . . .


Amber asked: Oh, and I wanted to say that I have a new actor crush. The hottest guy out there on TV? The one who makes ME swoon (which has never happened before)? Rupert Penry-Jones. *swoon* *fans self* Did you see him in The 39 Steps? OMG.

Rupert? Who is this Rupert you speak of? Surely you mean . . .

CAPTAIN WENTWORTH.

You MUST watch Persuasion (2007). And I'll watch The 39 Steps. And then we'll come back here, and we'll be like: "OMGGGGG RUUUUPEEERRRT SOOOO DREAAAMMY!!!"


Jessie asked: Is Anna your very FIRST book written ever? Or do you have another (or others) 'under the bed'?

Yes and no. Anna is the first book I finished, and the first book I showed to people and tried to sell. But Lola is technically my first book! Which adds a lovely complication to our history. Lola and I are about to have our TEN YEAR anniversary this autumn. Pretty frightening.

I never made it far with her, and she used to be veryveryvery different (adult, for one thing). I set her aside when, well, I had to. But shortly after, I had my wondrous Anna dream! I launched into writing her story one week later.

(An excellent career move, if I say so myself.)

I credit that old, ugly, never-ending, never-finished version of Lola with teaching me how to write. Old Lola prepared me for Anna. And everything about new Lola has changed, with the exception of the setting and the characters. They wouldn't leave me alone! It was an exciting moment while working on Anna when I realized the books had a connection. I was THRILLED to know these characters I loved were still salvageable, that I could still tell their story!

Even if their story had changed. Drastically.

In other words, there's nothing under my bed except for dog fur and a large Rubbermaid container of shoes. Unless you count old Lola. Which you probably should.


Terresa asked: Your first book (and cover) sound divine. Have you sold the movie rights yet? I can see it in lights already...

Thank you!! And sadly, no. Wouldn't that be cool? I hope it happens someday!


I'm burrowing into a hole this week to work, so if you don't see me around much, that's why.

THE HOLE

Thanks to Stella and Elizabeth, I feel the beautiful, wistful brush of hope again.

And the winner is . . .

WOW. I just typed 265 entries into this random name picker! I am thrilled so many of you were interested in my romance-themed giveaway, and I'm already scheming up the next one. Look for it this April!

I'd love to draw out the process, throw in a few commercial breaks or whatnot, but I'll leave that level of cruelty to reality television.

So the winner . . . izzzzzzzz . . .

CHLOE!

Chloe's comment said: "I'm kind of a sucker for romance. Titanic, Twilight, Vampire Academy, Beautiful Creatures... Pretty much the entirety of all of those are some of my favorite romantic scenes."

You're in the right place! I'm a sucker for romance, too.

Er. Obviously.

Congratulations, Chloe! [If you have not received my email, consider it stolen by gremlins, and please send your mailing address to: steph AT stephanieperkins.com] And thank you to everyone else for entering. My heart is happy and warm.

There were many comments in agreement with me about North and South, as well as Pride and Prejudice — both the Matthew Macfadyen AND Colin Firth versions. (For the record: OF COURSE I also love the Firth version!) Several of you mentioned The Rain Scene, and I especially loved commenter Emily for typing out the line from The Hero Walk Through the Fog: "You have bewitched me body and soul and I lov-I lov-love you."

The stuttering! Swoon.

Here are the other entries that recieved multiple mentions:

— Hermione and Ron FINALLY getting together
— Penelope
— The Notebook
— Love Actually (Nearly *every* scene/character was mentioned!)
— Candy shop scene in Shiver
— Peeta and Katniss (The Hunger Games, Catching Fire)
— The end of Secretary
— Bridget Jones' Diary (film)
— THE LETTER in Persuasion
— Nora and Patch making out in the kitchen (Hush, Hush)
— Becoming Jane
— 10 Things I Hate About You
— Room With a View (film)
— Say Anything
— Dear Frankie
— The Princess Diaries
— Twilight
— Beauty and the Beast (Disney)
— Jane Eyre
— Titanic
— Colonel Brandon & Marianne (Sense & Sensibility)
— The Phantom of the Opera
— Wuthering Heights
— Rose & Dimitri (Vampire Academy)

You have EXCELLENT taste, friends. And there were dozens of novels and films (and manga!) that got singular mentions, some of which I'd heard of and some of which I hadn't. Cool!

Here are a few of my favorite comments:

Auntie Maim: My favorite is from one of the books in Francesca Lia Block's Dangerous Angels, I think Weetzie Bat (I'm away from my books right now). It's a first kiss: "A kiss about apple pie a la mode with the vanilla creaminess melting in the pie heat. A kiss about chocolate, when you haven't eaten chocolate in a year. A kiss about palm trees speeding by, trailing pink clouds when you drive down the Strip sizzling with champagne. A kiss about spotlights fanning the sky and the swollen sea spilling like tears all over your legs."

I looooooooove the Weetzie Bat series. LOVE LOVE LOVE!

Begy: One of my most fave romantic scenes is from Brokeback Mountain, when Jack is saying "I wish I knew how to quit you" to Ennis.

AHHH! I KNOW! And *THE JACKET* at the end! Sob sob sob.

Melissa: My single favorite scene from a movie is at the end of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, when the whole house is falling apart around them and Clementine whispers "Meet me in Montauk." The fact that they find each other again... oh! It just almost makes me believe in fate.

It DOES make me believe in fate! Such a perfect film.

L.K. Madigan's Valley Girl breakdown:

Randy (Nicolas Cage) hides in a bathroom waiting for Julie to show up, because he's a bad boy with semi-punk hair who got thrown out of the party, but he really wants to get to know her. Finally she comes in, and he asks her to leave with him. She's adorably shocked and Valley Girl-ish, and says, "Where would we go?"

"I don't care."

"Well, what would we do?"

"Anything."

HE JUST WANTS TO BE WITH HER.

He gazes at her soulfully, and she finally says yes. Then he gives her a quick kiss, and leaves by the window. They meet outside with their BFFs and have adventures in Hollywood, complete with the Plimsouls singing in a dive bar and then kissing while they look at the lights in the Valley.

It's been way too long since I've seen Valley Girl. Hello, Netflix!

And how much did I love Renee for putting Cherry Darling and El Wray from Planet Terror on her list? Oh, man! They totally got me, too. Best zombie fighting couple ever! And at least two people pointed out that I'd forgotten to mention Across the Universe.

WAIT. WHAT?!?!?!?

You're right. And I'm mortified. I'd better make up for it with a video (spoiler alert/end of film):

Okay. And now I'm crying.

I love that movie.

Oh! And I totally wanted to give my friends/critique partners Kiersten White and Sumner Smith EXTRA ENTRIES for saying nice things about my novel. It's a good thing I'm STRONG and can RESIST the temptation of FLATTERY.

(Barely.)

Sumner: Also — I'm quite partial to Anna and her English French American boy.

Kiersten: Okay, and I'm not sucking up because the drawing is random, but one of my all time favorite kissing scenes is IN YOUR BOOK. WHICH I NEED A PHYSICAL COPY OF SOON SOON SOON so I can read it whenever I want and SWOON SWOON SWOON.

But if that doesn't count, in Willa Cather's O Pioneers! there is an achingly beautiful kiss between two doomed lovers. Ah, doomed love. So not fun in real life, so delicious in literature.

I love that scene! The O Pioneers! one, I mean.

And — cough cough — mine, too.

I still have another Paris post coming, but I'm not quite up to it yet. Is it weird to be homesick for a place that isn't your home? For whatever it's worth, I am. I miss France. I miss it so much, I'm finding it difficult to talk about.

It's a good thing I'll always have romance.

Giveaway! For reals! Enter! If you want!

From Kate Beaton's Hark! A Vagrant. Which you should read.

Twenty-six hours, four flights, and two missing suitcases later . . . I'm home. The airline assures me the luggage will arrive in a few days. But whatever. Did I mention I'm home? Which means I AM NOT IN PARIS?

Sigh.

My last week was as heavenly as the rest. I have a few more pictures and fun stories to share, but as the cord that connects my camera to my computer is in my luggage, they'll have to wait. (And hopefully my laptop will be fixed this week. I'm using a desktop Mac right now, which is noisy and sits next to Mr. T's litterbox but, on the plus side, turns on. Which is more than my laptop can say.)

Mr. Tumnus. Because I missed him.

I swear I did not name my cat after James McAvoy.

So I'll wrap up Paris later. Besides, I have something BETTER to talk about — A GIVEAWAY!

As most of you know, Anna and the French Kiss is a love story. It's also about Other Things, of course, but . . . mainly it's about a hunky dreamboat and making out. So as Valentine's Day approaches, I'm honoring love stories — and Anna! — by giving away:

♥ A classic romance, Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice

♥ A contemporary YA romance — like Anna! — Brad Barkley and Heather Hepler's Scrambled Eggs at Midnight

♥ Orange blossom marshmallows from Ladurée

ZEE PRIZE

I selected Pride and Prejudice, because it's my favorite love story and, even if you already have it, it's my firm belief that you can never own too many copies. I mean, IT'S MR. DARCY. And how fantastic is the cover of this new edition?

I selected Scrambled Eggs at Midnight, because I wanted a YA novel you might not be familiar with. Here is Booklist's description:

"My mother is a wench. It says so right on her W-2." Fifteen-year-old Calliope (Cal) is tired of sleeping in tents and following her free-spirited mother, who works at Renaissance fairs, selling handmade jewelry and serving drinks. She yearns for four walls, her father back in Texas, and a deeper sense of place, connection, and love. While spending the summer in Asheville, North Carolina, Cal meets Elliot, whose father runs a Christian camp for overweight kids. Like David Levithan and Rachel Cohn's Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, this coauthored love story unfolds in alternating chapters narrated in Cal and Elliot's hilarious, heart-tugging voices.

I adore this novel! It's strange I've never mentioned it here before — or their second novel, Dream Factory, which I also love — because it's romantic and clever and just-so-happens to take place in my town. AND it's published by Dutton, who is publishing Anna and the French Kiss.

YAY DUTTON! I LOVE YOU!

Finally, I wanted to bring you macarons from Paris, but since they grow stale within a day, here's the next best thing – marshmallows in my favorite Ladurée macaron flavor, fleur d'oranger. Decadent!

♥ HOW TO ENTER ♥

(1) Leave a comment in this post about your favorite romantic scene(s) from a novel or a film.

This puts your name into the drawing once. If you'd like additional chances to win . . .

(2) Link to this post from your blog! Let me know in the comments if you do this.

This puts your name in the drawing TWO more times.

(3) Link to this post from your Twitter account! Let me know in the comments if you do this.

This also puts your name in the drawing TWO more times.


So if you do all three steps, your name will be in the drawing five times! You have the rest of this week to enter (through the end of Sunday), and I'll announce the winner on Monday, February 8th. This way, the package can arrive before Valentine's Day.

[EDITED TO ADD: Yes! This contest is open internationally!]

Good luck!

To get you in the spirit, here are a few of MY favorite romantic scenes. I'm sticking with movies, because I'm feeling kinda lazy.

Will Ferrell singing "Whole Wide World" to Maggie Gyllenhaal in Stranger Than Fiction:

Mr. Thornton and Margaret at the train station in North and South (spoiler alert/end of film):

I also love the heartache in the "Look back at me" scene. If you like Austen-type films and you HAVEN'T seen the BBC's adaptation of Elizabeth Gaskell's North and South, HOLYCUPCAKES GO RENT IT NOW NOW NOW!

Ah hem.

The triple kissing in Amélie (spoiler alert/end of film):

Christian singing "Your Song" to Satine in Moulin Rouge!:

I also love the finale. Oh, it kills me.

And, of course, the rain scene in 2005's Pride and Prejudice:

Also swoon-inducing is The Hero Walk, of which I couldn't find a video! It's a good thing I HAVZ PICTURE:

The Hero Walk, complete with fog and billowy coat.

Is that enough? Not for me, but it probably is for you!

And now I'm eager to hear about YOUR favorite romantic scenes.


MONDAY MORNING, FEB. 8th: The giveaway is officially closed. The winner will be announced later today!

Twitter Linkage + Writing Advice + A Gift from James McAvoy

A few weeks ago, I posted a video of Australian comedian Tim Minchin singing a Very Amusing song called, "If I Didn't Have You."

Last night, literary superhunk Neil Gaiman tweeted a link to this Minchin Christmas song:





I was surprised by how . . . beautiful it was.

Quite different from the majority of his work, though it still has a touch of sly humor. Here's another favorite, a poem called "Angry (Feet)," the sort of thing I'd normally expect from Minchin (R-rated language, for those who care). LOVE this one, as it's weird and creepy, and I am fond of weird and creepy:





Also on Twitter last night, editor Cheryl Klein linked to this fantastic post by novelist Jennifer Crusie about plot structure. If you're a writer, check it out! I liked it so much that I printed out a copy.

And to continue the randomness of this post — I am still not quite over the flu, so I'll blame it on that (but it's really just because I'm lazy) — here's a question from my friend Amber Nicole Brooks. Amber and I were in undergrad together, and she's a FABULOUS writer. She's also the first person I trusted to read my "professional" writing. [Which was really, really bad, you guys. So, a round of applause for Amber!]


Amber asked:

How do you stop yourself from re-reading, and re-reading stuff you've already written? (I mean stuff such as the prior chapters you've drafted for the book.) I like to do this, as some sort of punishment or procrastination.


Oh, man.

Um.

Hmm.

How to answer . . . how to answer . . .

Okay, the truth is this: I don't know. I honestly don't know. We're stepping into Achilles' heel territory here. I am pretty much one of the worst writers I know when it comes to re-reading work and not moving forward. I am a CHAMPION re-reader. WORLD-CLASS, A++ PROCRASTINATOR AND SELF-PUNISHER.

I loooooathe moving forward. Or, at least, I'm bad at it.

I enjoy tinkering. Tinker tinker tinker! I am an EXCELLENT tinker-er! If I could prettify and rewrite preexisting scenes all night long, I'd be a happy Stephanie. Unfortunately, scenes do not write themselves. And eventually it comes down to this:

Move forward or quit.

The only thing I hate more than moving forward? Quitting. So maybe you should post that above your desk: MOVE FORWARD OR QUIT! Unless you're prone to quitting things. Then it should read: MOVE FORWARD OR QUIT! Just so you know which option to pick.

Other ideas to try:


(A) A quick, ugly draft. Ask a friend to set a deadline for you. One that seems absolutely ridiculous. And then . . . power through it. Remind yourself again and again and again that beautiful writing comes LATER. It always comes later, because you don't know what you're writing about until you reach the end. You may think you know. But you don't. So it's best to let the early drafts be fast and ugly, because chances are high that you'll have to rewrite the entire thing anyway. Sorry.

(B) Bribe yourself. What do you want? Congratulations! Now you can't have it until you move forward. HA.


I find that a combination of (A) and (B) works best for me.

Anyone else have any advice to offer on this subject? My ears and blog comments are wide open!

Also . . . because I love him, and because several of you who read my blog also love him, and 'Tis the Season and all that, here's My Live-In Celebrity Boyfriend Chris Martin singing "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" with Conan O'Brien:





Oh, what the heck. I'm in a video-y mood. Here's another silly one, for Coldplay fans only. It was their 2006 Christmas message. The costumes make me so happy!





Oh. And Chris wants me to tell you that he's kicking Wee James McAvoy's butt in Clue right now. They've been very competitive with the board games this year.

And now he wants me to tell you — in case you ever find yourself playing Clue with him in the future — that he is always, always Professor Plum. And Wee James is Miss Scarlet.

OKAY, CHRIS! ENOUGH!

Now he wants me to tell you Happy Christmas. So "Happy Christmas" from Chris Martin.

And now, of course, Wee James is shouting at me to tell you Happy Christmas too, but to make it in a LARGER PRINT than Chris's message. So:

HAPPY CHRISTMAS from JAMES MCAVOY

He also wants me to include a picture of a pygmy goat. I'm not sure why. Maybe because it's Wee like him?




So there's your pygmy goat from James McAvoy.

And now I'm going to stop typing before Chris makes me post a picture of a juggling hamster or bicycle shaped like a pickle or something.